Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Randomize
