are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
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