i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
