Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
