i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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