scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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