How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
It all started with a game of naked twister.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
