I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
May the power of my ass compel you!!
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
