Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Randomize
