I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize