Your tits are I can't wait for
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
