My room smells like vodka and shame
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
