i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
