Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize