i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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