I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
