stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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