you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
