Don't make out with my wife yet
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
