Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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