The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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