we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
