Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
