is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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