This girl is more easily done than said...
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
