The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
