i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
do herpes really smell.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
