dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Randomize
