Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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