May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
