I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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