This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
