D3 body, D1 cock
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
