Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
