You're completely useless in the revolution.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize
