the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
