I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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