He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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