Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
