I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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