We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
