I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize