If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
