I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
