D3 body, D1 cock
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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