i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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