I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
should my penis look like a turkey
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
