It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Randomize
