loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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