omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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